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Joke: What Happens When Lesbians Have Sex?
- Sorry fellas, it's a cold world.
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Broseph_McbrahUploaded 03/02/2018 -
- 41.8k Views
- 12 Comments
- 0 Favorites
NEWEST JOKES - FEATURED
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Media jokes
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Filter featured
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Joke: A Guy Walks Into a Bar and Sees a Jar of $100 Bills on the Counter
- He asks the bartender "Hey, what's with the jar?" *Contains NSFW Language*
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RobynHitchcockUploaded 02/28/2018 in Funny -
- 32.1k Views
- 6 Comments
- 2 Favorites
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The 12 Inch Pianist
- You don't always get what you really want...
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dufflebagboy95Uploaded 04/27/2008 in Funny -
- 467k Views
- 26 Comments
- 4 Favorites
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Dreaming Numbers
- I was walking down the street the other day when I saw my buddy Matt. I walked up to him and mentioned that I had the most bizarre dream the...
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guitarloverUploaded 10/27/2010
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- 186k Views
- 514 Comments
- 6 Favorites
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Drunk
- A Virginia State trooper pulled a car over on I-64 about 2 miles south of the Virginia/West Virginia State line.. When the trooper asked the...
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rattlebox02Uploaded 10/16/2010
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- 189k Views
- 389 Comments
- 12 Favorites
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Drunk Irishman
- Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating St Patrick's Day. Mick, the bartender says, 'You'll not...
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xckxgoaleprcaunUploaded 03/24/2009
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- 104k Views
- 248 Comments
- 14 Favorites
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Flat Chest
- A very flat-chested woman finally decided she needed a bra and set out to the mall in search of one in her size. She entered an upscale...
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blooddiamondsUploaded 03/11/2010
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- 296k Views
- 274 Comments
- 9 Favorites
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My Needs
- Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. But then the wife stops and says, "I don' t feel like it. I...
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amphora13579Uploaded 02/24/2010
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- 226k Views
- 329 Comments
- 33 Favorites
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Hedge Clippers
- A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped, and every once...
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roxanna_usUploaded 02/05/2010
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- 142k Views
- 243 Comments
- 22 Favorites
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Why Women Shouldn't Take Men Shopping
- After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and...
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matman747Uploaded 02/02/2010
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- 197k Views
- 413 Comments
- 74 Favorites
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44th Birthday
- Two weeks ago was my 44th birthday and I wasn`t feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and...
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BrandonARUploaded 01/07/2010
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- 155k Views
- 406 Comments
- 17 Favorites
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No-Parking Zone
- There was once a little girl and a little boy in kindergarten. One day, the little boy pulled down his pants and asked the little girl,...
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daveatniteUploaded 12/31/2009
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- 140k Views
- 317 Comments
- 9 Favorites
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One-Liners
- 1) Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting a tomato in a fruit salad. 2) The early bird might get the worm, but the...
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xxfregiltxxUploaded 11/28/2009
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- 293k Views
- 339 Comments
- 232 Favorites
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The Men's rules
- We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are OUR rules: Please note… these...
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guinness13494Uploaded 11/07/2009
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- 258k Views
- 661 Comments
- 159 Favorites
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Subject Drug Warning
- Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, partygoers and unsuspecting pub regulars to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from...
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thelegenderyUploaded 10/12/2009
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- 145k Views
- 290 Comments
- 19 Favorites
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The Lie Detector Robot
- John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One...
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KingRolo0503Uploaded 09/10/2009
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- 150k Views
- 404 Comments
- 29 Favorites
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Rude and Arrogant Americans
- The train was quite crowded, and a U. S. Marine walked the entire length looking for a seat.. There seemed to be one next to a well-dressed,...
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237gUploaded 08/30/2009
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- 114k Views
- 319 Comments
- 30 Favorites
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Why I Had to Change Hotels Last Week
- Last week I checked into my hotel in Tampa and was a bit lonely. I thought, I'll call one of those girls you see advertised in phone books like...
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LTlingerieUploaded 08/31/2009
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- 147k Views
- 289 Comments
- 25 Favorites
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Perfect Eyesight
- Arthur is 90 years old. He's played golf every day since his retirement 25 years ago. One day he arrives home looking downcast. "That's...
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thelegenderyUploaded 08/30/2009
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- 116k Views
- 301 Comments
- 9 Favorites
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Whaling on the High Seas
- A pair of whales, a male and his mate were swimming along one day when they came upon a whaling vessel. M: ''Oh shit!'' F: ''What is it?'' M:...
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CaptainJUploaded 07/22/2009
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- 87.1k Views
- 193 Comments
- 7 Favorites
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Worldwide Survey
- A worldwide survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the...
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midnite492Uploaded 06/13/2009
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- 106k Views
- 494 Comments
- 21 Favorites
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Age Vs Wisdom
- A guy is 86 years old and loves to fish. He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, "Pick me up." He...
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ADLifeUploaded 06/11/2009
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- 134k Views
- 393 Comments
- 15 Favorites
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French Prostitutes
- Annoyed by the professor of anatomy who liked to tell "naughty" stories during class, a group of female students decided that the next...
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rockzilla411Uploaded 06/03/2009
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- 139k Views
- 484 Comments
- 22 Favorites
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CDC Medical Alert
- The CDC has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even...
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Ricky2Uploaded 05/14/2009
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- 84.4k Views
- 423 Comments
- 16 Favorites
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REINCARNATION
- Jason came home from the pub late one Friday evening stinking drunk (as he often did) and crept into bed beside his wife who was already...
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pbl0Uploaded 04/15/2009
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- 121k Views
- 459 Comments
- 32 Favorites
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20 years with my wife
- A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She put on her robe and went downstairs. He was sitting at the kitchen...
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pbl0Uploaded 04/01/2009
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- 164k Views
- 570 Comments
- 27 Favorites
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Socialism - Good on Paper, Not in Reality...
- An economics professor at Texas Tech said he had failed very few students but had, once, failed an entire class. That class had insisted that...
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wxb200Uploaded 04/02/2009
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- 118k Views
- 1243 Comments
- 36 Favorites
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Some Things You Just Can't Explain
- A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar getting saused. A man comes in and asks the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful...
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thelegenderyUploaded 03/09/2009
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- 146k Views
- 458 Comments
- 25 Favorites
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Joys of Shopping
- A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. 'What do you...
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crackrocksteadyUploaded 03/04/2009
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- 97.2k Views
- 384 Comments
- 20 Favorites
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Four Worms
- Four Worms and a lesson to be learned: A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms...
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thelegenderyUploaded 02/24/2009
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- 98k Views
- 462 Comments
- 11 Favorites
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Animals kicking their habits..
- A Little Rabbit is running happily through the woods when he comes across a Giraffe rolling a joint. He runs up the Giraffe and says, "Hey,...
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yuri_vaultinUploaded 02/26/2009
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- 85.6k Views
- 463 Comments
- 17 Favorites
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The Duck Hunter
- A duck hunter was out enjoying a nice morning on the marsh when he decided to take a leak.... He walked over to a tree and propped up his gun. ...
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milestyles55Uploaded 02/19/2009
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- 86.4k Views
- 535 Comments
- 5 Favorites
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Son in law
- One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He'd toss them in the air, and then catch them in his mouth In the middle of...
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twcdotcomUploaded 02/18/2009
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- 104k Views
- 472 Comments
- 11 Favorites
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Single vs. Engaged vs. MARRIED!!
- Sipping her drink, the single girl leered and said, "Last Friday at the end of the work day I went to my boyfriend's office wearing a...
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Ryan1966Uploaded 02/05/2009
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- 99.2k Views
- 340 Comments
- 25 Favorites
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Ear infection
- This is so true! They always ask at the doctor's office why you are there, and you have to answer in front of others what's wrong -- and...
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APBondsUploaded 02/08/2009
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- 106k Views
- 271 Comments
- 46 Favorites
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Women Should Never Ask
- There are five things that women should never, ever ask a guy, according to an article in an issue of Sassy magazine. The five questions...
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thelegenderyUploaded 01/29/2009
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- 209k Views
- 10336 Comments
- 15 Favorites
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What would you do?
- A man returns home a day early from a business trip. It's after midnight. While en route home he asks the cabby if he would be a witness. The...
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imdave77Uploaded 01/28/2009
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- 173k Views
- 569 Comments
- 18 Favorites
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The Queen's Breasts
- Once upon a time lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts. Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the...
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rondettoUploaded 01/27/2009
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- 378k Views
- 581 Comments
- 46 Favorites
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Happy and Sad
- A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology when he turned to his wife and said, "Honey, I bet you can't tell me...
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Ryan1966Uploaded 01/26/2009
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- 143k Views
- 915 Comments
- 23 Favorites
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eBaum's Picks
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Top 5
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Contest
- Take that Sucka
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Congrats! TedNugentUploaded 03/25/2023 - Submissions (13)
- 6.9k Views
- View All Contests
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